Archive for self esteem

Command Your Own Ship

A few days ago, I had a huge insight while navigating the subconscious patterns of my past so that I can remedy them and not take them into my future.

Navigating and over-writing the past is essential to creating a joy-filled life.

I came to see that throughout my lifetime I had been deferring my own greatness to other people.  For example, I conceded to teachers and adults growing up, because that’s what I was expected to do. There was no concept of self-respect or self-honor in my upbringing, only respecting men and my elders. As I got older my deference turned to those with more experience and education than I had, rather than seeing the value of my own experience. Even in my businesses, I deferred to employees, co-workers and partners because I saw the value in what they brought to the table, over my own value.

In my moment of introspecting I came to see that my last business partner didn’t make me feel small or like an employee. That was a story I had been telling myself.  The issue wasn’t her, it was me. it was that I didn’t hold myself up as her equal. My big “aha” was that she brought the money, but I brought the experience. I ran the entire show. She was a silent partner but, in my head, at the time, she wasn’t silent.  She didn’t make me feel less about myself, feeling less-than is what I made of her.

Along with this came the knowing that I am the commander of my ship. I used to say that I am the captain of my vessel, but then I realized that I was standing in a little dingy.  It’s easy to stand alone in a little boat and not get very far and sometimes that little boat just goes around in circles.

Image result for the helm

Commanding a ship requires self-trust, self-respect and self-honor, and it requires holding yourself in high-esteem. 

It requires knowing that you chart the course and what others bring to the table is of no greater value than what you bring to the table. They are your support team, your officers and deck hands. The ship won’t run without the entire team but taking the bow and charting the course takes inner-knowing that you have earned your place at the helm and you are the commander.

Have the fortitude to set your course, free of doubt, and know the resources will come to support you. The resources will come from wherever they come, and you need to stand tall in who you are, rather than defer your own greatness to those who appear to have more.

Remember, it isn’t about them, it’s about you.

It’s about each of us standing boldly in who we are. It’s about valuing our own gifts, education and experiences and seeing what we bring to the table as invaluable and worthy of investment.


It’s Time to Own It

Oprah Winfrey said, after interviewing thousands of people, “The show has taught me there is a common thread that runs through all of our pain and all of our suffering, and that is unworthiness. Not feeling worthy enough to own the life you were created for. Even people who believe they deserve to be happy and have nice things often don’t feel worthy once they have them…”

What a relief it was to know that I wasn’t alone in my struggle with feelings of less than – beliefs in unworthiness appeared to be epidemic.

Except for those who take the time to really look for it and work through their feelings, I suspect it may be getting worse.  It isn’t’ that our feelings of unworthiness are getting worse. The issues have always been there, the only difference is that we are finally recognizing, acknowledging and wanting to heal them.  We are no longer willing to let others beat us down and tell us we don’t deserve what we were created for.

That is precisely why I wrote the guidebook Own Your True Worth: 7 Secrets to Free Yourself from Beliefs of Unworthiness.

This guidebook is now available on Kindle and is coming soon as a pocketbook to carry with you when you need a little boost.

3 reasons why you want to pick up my new e-book:own_your-true-worth-cover

1) You’ll get access to my seven secrets for really “owning it.”

2) You will understand where self-esteem comes from and why low self-worth is such a difficult habit to kick.

3) You will receive new tools for recognizing issues of worth-lessness and how to boost your self-worth from belittled to bold.

Living a life you love is the result of freeing yourself from liming and fear-based beliefs that stand in the way of being completely joyful and fulfilled.

• Are you ready to live that you dream of living but doubt gets in the way?
• Are you working at your dream job but are afraid it won’t last?
• Did you finally get the gig you’ve always been after but still haven’t cashed the check?
• You found Mr. Perfect but wonder what he’s doing with you?
• Does it seem like every time you start getting ahead something happens to ruin it for you.
• Maybe you have everything thing that “should” make you happy but it’s never quite enough.

Perhaps the real issue isn’t your circumstances at all….

Perhaps the real issues instead stem from your unconscious beliefs about your worth. While the issue is the issue, how you see yourself in the issue is also the issue. Feelings of worth can be as subtle as feeling less than, to all consuming feelings of unworthiness.  Unresolved issues surrounding self-worth manifest in everything you touch, from relationships to earning a living.

This guidebook gives you an understanding of where self-worth comes from, how it gets belittled and bullied out of you, and how to remedy it so that you own your true value and live a life you love.

Until next time, be bold, fearless & free. 

Victoria Reynolds Signature